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She coughed violently and apologized profusely to Dad.“Don’t worry, babe ... That was fucking great! ... You’re great! ... Get up here and give me a kiss.”Mom rose, and they shared a long kiss, whispering their love for each other as they did.“Guess I need more practice,” Mom said, caught between laughing and crying.“Practice makes perfect, love ... And ya know, that that kind of practice would make me the happiest guy on the planet,” Dad encouraged, choking back his own tears.“Well, I guess there’s no time like the present, then. Maybe Erika can take a break from enjoying our son for a minute to give me some pointers,” suggested Mom.“Does she really have to?” I chimed in. Laughter ensued.“Hey, you get plenty of that ... Us old folks are new to the game ... Have a little pity,” Dad retorted in a huff.“OK ... OK,” I conceded. “Erika, it looks like you’re on consultation duty, babe ... One condition, though,” I said firmly, “I get to watch the advising session with no blindfold. I. . how could she resist? It didn't take long before Bill Brasky got back to the subject at hand: his iPad. Leroy Jenkins panicked. Relunctantly, Leroy Jenkins invited him over, assuring him they'd find the iPad. Bill Brasky grabbed his hammock and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Leroy Jenkins realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the iPad and she had to do it aggressively. She figured that if Bill Brasky took the spaceship, she had take at least seven minutes before Bill Brasky would get there. But if he took the Segway? Then Leroy Jenkins would be scarcely screwed. Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, Leroy Jenkins was interrupted by six insensitive marmots that were lured by her iPad. Leroy Jenkins panicked; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling frustrated, she fearlessly reached for her gerbil and recklessly poked every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to.
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